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Sunday, October 16, 2016

Thinking or Thought

                                                  Thinking or Thought


The topic of Thinking or Thought is a heady mix  of many things even if we exclude mere articulation  of  ideas, reproduction of information, opinions, prejudices from the purview. But we  cannot leave these. 


Surprisingly these reveal the inherent vulnerabilities of thinking and the whole thought process and if we add the multiple dynamics of external influences to it then we may realize it is after all not that great a tool but still a very useful one for want of any other better and rational alternative. 


We may spice it up with other concomitant aspects like wisdom for enhanced and humanitarian  approach.




Saturday, October 15, 2016

Elaborate explanation of brevity

I would like to elaborate on the actual meaning of ‘brevity’.

While everyone agrees that moderation is the sign of sanity but context is the deciding factor in vicinity and visibility.

Wise political strategy requires venting of natural mass emotions and also moderating it with voices of moderation from higher authorities.

When we ‘quote’ something it conveys what we want much better /effectively than what we may have to struggle to come out with an articulation of our own.

But the problem with quotes is that when they are used to convey the hidden intentions the covering up becomes conspicuous at least in contours [perhaps like the hidden anatomy of heroines in rain drenched transparent cloths of Bollywood  films].

Even Shakespeare made it very clear that ‘Brevity is the soul of wit’ please note he meant only ‘soul of wit’ and not in anything else.

Perhaps we may add brevity in emergency situations or for reasons of diplomatic wheedling where the recipients are made to get embroiled in multiple interpretations.

But definitely brevity is not meant for any detailed and planned military operations or the resultant expressions of spontaneous eruption of emotions [joy or sorrow], more so, when they manifest as mass euphoria or mass frenzy due to the much awaited paradigm shift in attitude of often  ending  up in a situation where each one of us say desperately or out of indifference say, as very well conveyed in this quote,  ‘I don't have a solution but I admire the problem’. The function of genius is not to give new answers, but to pose new questions - which time and mediocrity can solve.-Hugh Trevor-Roper - Men and Event

Basically human beings are animalistic by instinct and impulse but use or expected to use or obliged to use the sixth sense when they want to become or be or behave like a social beings.

There has been initially some over dosage of war and victory in the whole of history.

Then slowly the intellectual giants injected through epics and myths wisdom and values as justifications to ensure that humanity accepted wisdom and values as inevitable dosage of medicines in order to evolve as better social beings to lead life together with all other species with some ethics and rules.

This, I feel was perhaps the larger intention and subtle message of all epics, and not prowess in archery or skill in using all sorts of crude weapons for gruesome results or for cinematic effects.

It is all well known that whenever there is a victory or success in any field of activity people go gaga over it and also resort to all sorts of claims.

It happens when any country wins a game of football or cricket and it is nothing but a manifestation of jubilation.

To my knowledge Shakespeare himself, had he been brief in debating over the dead body of Julius Caesar the world would have lost one of the most inspiring speeches by Mark Antony and the others  and also lost a marvelous piece of literature and multiple templates for logical and emotional justifications.

What about Shakespeare’s famous soliloquies and sermonizing speeches of his characters.

If brevity alone has been insisted as in SMS or Twitter, then, perhaps, only didactic sermons would have survived and all literature buried; only poetry would have survived and not music and songs; only bed rooms would have existed and not wedding celebrations; only dictates of powerful leaders and not political speeches and debates; only barter system and not the complicated economic structures and so on.

We need to remember over simplifying, over generalizing and over homogenization are all against natural evolution.

Brevity in many contexts is like raw vegetables and plants, one cannot eat them as they are; they need elaborate cooking and attractive dressing combined with the aroma of enticing spices.

Shakespeare whose ‘brevity is the soul of wit’ is often quoted out of context.

Shakespeare himself  knew that his spontaneity of expression and elaborate exhibition of emotions of his characters needed lot of elaboration and realized that even the existing vocabulary of the language was  inadequate that he ended up coining at least 1700 new words and expressions and introduced them into the English language which ultimately enriched both the language and literature.

It was good that he never misunderstood the meaning of brevity out of context.

Can anyone define the ‘brevity’ or at least recommend it in all contexts.

Had Lord Krishna chosen to be brief, in fact that is the expected line of activity in crisis, and instructed Arjuna to just go and plunder the enemy with arrows the world would not have got the Bhagawat Geetha running into several chapters of great philosophy.

The world would have been deprived of  great rational and philosophical lecture on professional integrity if the architect in Ayn Rand’s Fountain head just said he wanted to do this or that ,instead of  elaborating the reasons.
Elaboration is both excellent and inevitable [1]
Even abbreviated attire is recommended for swimming [gender neutral] not while strolling in chill weather.

On what basis can one decide brevity?

I can furnish single sentences, meaningful ones, not the unpunctuated ones like mine, which run to pages.

So, can someone produce one such sentence and claim that he has been brief as he has used only one sentence. [2]

The level of enthusiasm and exaggeration varies from individual to individual and from context to context when it comes to expressing and communicating.



Stories of revenge and restoring relatively better option through all means, sometimes involving violence as a means,   fills the pages of history of humanity and is also the main plot in many epics be it Ramayana or Mahabhratha.

In all such episodes in history and epics there has always been celebration of victory and condemnation of defeat.

Both are wrong and everyone who can pitch in either in main stream media or social media have their right to express their opinion in their own way, of course, with the rider, to ensure that whatever they say does not ignite further trouble or foment more violent reaction and escalate animosity.
But then in success and victory always as a rule covers all blunders. When India wins a match no one question about shot selection of a number 10 batsman.

So, we need to debate and define ‘brevity’ with context specific meaning. [3]



Thursday, October 13, 2016

Why case to case different positions are taken.

Why case to case different positions are taken.

1. There is no such thing in socio- legal system as status quo with axiomatic certitude.

2. In every case various aspects are factored in according to the situation/ context [exchange of prisoners to save lives of many high jacked personalities- in every field there are exceptions which are considered with due discretionary powers].

3. In some issues lot of things are decided [like in Cauvery river water dispute] depending on the  parties involved in dispute along with over ignited emotions of many [either with real concern or hidden motives ] and exaggerated controversies along with politicized passions of the public and many more hidden and unknown issues.


4. So normally in such situations it is better to find techniques like delays, diversions till intensity of passions subside and sanity returns.

This is done intentionally so that a solution can be brought about or at least discussed with minimum hurt, damage and a preferably in a  conciliatory atmosphere.

5. Everything cannot be and need not be explained to media or social media.

6. However, everyone has a right to vent their feelings or voice their opinions.
7. This is what silently Vajpayee did when he created 3 new states within a week's time.

8. Whereas, you see what happened in Telangana people who were colleagues and neighbors all of a sudden were made to feel like aliens and enemies speaking the same language.

9. Let us appreciate what Chandrababu Naidu has done in the recent 9 months. He has built a canal to link Krishna River and Godavari River.

He silently solved the problem rather than making it an issue creating loss of lives and property etc.
10. Life's socio- political churning process seems to get struck in identities of various hues and colors

Unfortunately, in the whole world Life's socio- political churning process instead of becoming and being more rational, scientific and humane, seems to get struck in identities of various hues and colors indicating a mindset worse than that of the sixteenth century.



Identity crisis is becoming one of the greatest curses of this century



11.  In ThinkEdu16 conference in concluding session Sri Sri Ravishankar answered spontaneously very well to VC of a university in very simple terms how to avoid irrational depressions due to high expectations and corresponding disappointment.

He used just three very effective words. He said you definitely need 'Passion' to perform effectively but 'Dispassion' to carry on with shortcomings and failures. He said when you succeed in Passion you enjoy, when you have this 'Dispassion' then you do not 'hate yourself' between these two if you have 'Compassion' then you do not hate or blame others. So he said you need Passion, Dispassion and Compassion -all the three.

12. I think this simple mantra can contribute enough moderation and sense of balance which is the ultimate test of a matured person.

13. No one starts and must not start or cannot start or need not start all aspects of life in moderation.

14. Aggression, passion, influence, impact, intensity are the things that spice up the adventure of life but then everyone must grow out of these experiences into a matured balanced person acting with moderation.


16. But it is also high time that all individuals and institutions which feel responsible for youth, future generations, and posterity of humanity must emphasis and consciously promote  virtues of moderation, tolerance, forgiveness, compassion, accepting facts, happiness, contextual relevance of whatever is done  etc as most important tenets of emancipated human beings practicing a universal religion.


Friday, October 7, 2016

Schooling for mass literacy has its short comings but are there many easily adaptable alternatives out there ?


Very interesting, important and impactful speech but……then ….

I got it last week itself through the link given below.
Everyone cannot but agree with this person on many issues but….

Subject of speech: - Homogenized and uniform literacy.

I have already seen this and as you rightly said excellent and I rate it as among the many speeches which have had a great impact on the listener that they force the listener to think.


In fact when I listened to it the first time it took me back to the movie ‘ And Justice for All’ wherein Al Pacino used to argue his case and come out and sit on the stairs of the court or the wonderful arguments of  Howard Roark or the great talks of Osho and JK.


I am using all these for the impact that they have on the listener.


Of course, there are innumerable examples in the plays of Shakespeare, Kalidasa and many epics across several languages which got men to think of multiple possibilities and many logical approaches and evolve many systems and methods to lead a life.



In this particular subject I have also read some 26 years back De–schooling society by Ivan Illich and such similar stuff.



Having said all these, mass literacy, like democracy or anti-biotic, is accepted for want of a better alternative and sometimes we adopt it in totality as if it is the only method or succumb to it and unfortunately it also becomes  inevitable in certain circumstances.



However, within it or along with it or beyond it we can always play around.



Until and unless we have better alternatives or keep trying for better alternatives or at least allow space to think of better alternatives and also ensure to make the vested interest groups involved in promoting certain methods  all great thoughts, ideas and speeches will remain as unfertilized potential eggs pandering to  few moments of sensational titillation.



This also , invariably happens because of our utter disgust with existing systems we tend to oversimplify or over generalize extremely complicated and complex issues which as bad or little less  as those who have been trying to homogenize human beings, especially their psychological aspirations, feelings and creativity .


All these emanate as a result of a fundamentally wrong perspective based on bias towards homogenization and uniformity.


You may if you have time and want in detail links 1,2,3,4 given at the end on literacy, education, homogenization and the presumptions of success.


We need to carefully tread on issues where the speeches tend to be too judgmental, even if well meaning because their impact is so heavy that anyone can fall for them and that is what they are meant to be.


It is perfectly alright and nothing wrong but they may not be the ultimate solution especially without clear cut, easily adaptable alternatives.


Because such speeches are meant to be taken seriously as those who are making them are doing it out of total sincerity.

This is what I have learned while reading modern judgments, I mean the legal ones.

On Judgments:-

I have read many historic judgments (including some from the international court of justice as they used to get published in the 90s in some British magazines and many magazines which were using some of those judgments as tools to justify certain events and happenings).


Some excellent verdicts which I used to categorize and read based on clever interpretation of legality of the land; mastery of verbal articulation involving both logic and the 42 major logical fallacies; verdicts which showed the intellectual sharpness as well as concern for the principle of humanitarianism based on the philosophy of optimum benefit to the maximum number without hurting the feeling of many.



On articulation:-


Articulation is both an art and science but must not be mistaken as a mere mastery of words or linguistics skills.


Its greatness is its ability to deliver effective communication for various occasions and on several topics.


It is because articulation I believe is the flow of thoughts and ideas that use the wings of expressions to weave appropriate and appealing patterns.


That's why all great leaders, especially political and religious ones are very articulate and they do not exercise any restraint unless for diplomatic wheedling.




Articulation with appropriate definition and adequate elaboration brings out multiple nuances and niceties like canine senses of smell and which are all cleverly and pleasantly ensconced in the colorful expressions with a beauty like the multiple shades of pavonine splendor.


All said and done everything evolves and we must evolve along with active participation and involvement of wisdom, by wisdom I always mean these.


On Wisdom:-

Wisdom is the work shop where works of evolutionary trends and experiences of everyone in it emerge to express wisely the essence of everything to enlighten everyone;

A wisdom which prioritizes living in the present context and along with practicing certain time tested values which have relevance in present context but with global perspective to bequeath a livable planet, a lovable society with lovely infrastructures and improved living conditions;

A wisdom that evaluates everything and everyone with contextual relevance and based on the inherent attributes or merits of what or who is being evaluated without extrapolating any  presumptions, opinions, judgments, perceptions, expectations, ideologies, doctrines, identity based ideology and so on;
A wisdom which is willing to make minor adjustments, small compromises, spontaneous cooperation to create compatible and conducive atmosphere with humility devoid of any egocentric pride;

A wisdom with the realization and a perspective that must be aware that life is a constant process of learning of the multiple dimensions of many things and the various dynamics of those dimensions involving the constant interaction and interrelationship with everyone and everything.

A wisdom that is willing to accommodate multiple methods or means of life with some overall tolerant attitude embedded on humanitarian concerns towards all human life and environmental or natural concern towards all other species.

A wisdom that gets its clarity of understanding through a churning process that takes into consideration several aspects from the practical to the philosophical to the all fantasies of the mind.







Thursday, October 6, 2016

Reason and science -let us respect



Reason and romance are the two most influential  things that impact maximum the minds of impressionable age.

Misplaced messages belittle science and the holds guilty the religious freaks.

Science is a different ball game.

Let us give full  credit to whoever has discovered something for the benefit of humanity.

Claiming credit, consistency, ancientness, superiority or greater number of adherents is not going to make anyone or anything greater but on the contrary it is a symptom of pathetic attention seeking or desperate marketing.

Instead inspire children to listen talks like the one at the end  really inspiring to all and instructing to the elders and intimidating to some but will enable  children to think without biases and also more brilliantly.

Though like all domains it may have its own known or unknown, accepted and unaccepted short comings.

In simple terms it involves unbiased observations, in depth research, experiments carried out and empirical evidence well documented with universal applications along with a rider that it can or may be disproved or replaced with newer or better evidence without the original discovery or invention resisting it.

I am not even venturing into the minimal  jargon like hypotheses, target group, sample survey etc.

The greatest beauty of all scientific discoveries is that they benefit everyone irrespective of any extraneous considerations.

However, we all must remember that every scientific discovery or invention or creation involves many hours, days and years of research which should not be belittled by claiming that some tradition somewhere knew it already.

There is a growing trend of this illogical and fanatical resorting to refrain of  trying to assign all credits to religious past glory, whereas, in reality many aspects of religion has crossed their expiry date.

Worse is to do this resorting by trying to find some connectivity or justification devoid of logic and this will only push further the youth away from any good that the role of religion or the political ideologies may have .

Actually this is doing a disservice to the vulnerable minds of impressionable age because using these illogical statements/observations/claims the pseudo liberals will fill the gap with some counter logical fallacies.

So, stop doing this for the sake of religion, science, humanity, logic, youth and human race.

Let us always seek and search for synergy between science and spirituality, that too not religion or tradition.

There is nothing wrong in highlighting synergy or similarity but then that must be done before hand rather than claiming ‘we said so’ ‘we knew it already’ etc. Then where the hell have you stuffed in all that useful knowledge.

By claiming credit after the event you become guilty also of not sharing useful information for the benefit of all in a manner that everyone could have used rather than tucking it under some cloak of tradition or packing it off as some religious practice.  



SCIENCE AND SPIRITUALITY



Our education systems have killed inquiry, experience and have replaced everything with grand theoretical texts to be learnt and reproduced either with or without understanding. Science  has enhanced human living, made life more comfortable and helped human beings understand about life better and  far beyond what religions or arts or politics or perhaps all put together did or do. Their impact and influence is obvious in every sphere but unfortunately humanity respects and reveres science less and scientists are pushed into oblivion.



This whole write up is for people from various religions who are claiming that fasting rituals already knew what this year’s Nobel Laureate has discovered ‘autophagy’.

We are all aware that all human beings have to necessarily fast almost every day at least while sleeping.

This year’s Nobel Prize for medicine link here:


Wednesday, October 5, 2016

Refined volition and not revolution will be the result of intellectual approach.

Refined volition and not revolution will be the result of intellectual approach.

Intellect generates through nurturing refined volitions rather than throwing up revolutions.

So, when intellect is involved it is preferable to have refined volition rather than revolution.

These two terms ‘Volition’ and ‘Revolution’ indicate totally different connotations, the former a positive one and the later a negative one and their etymology too reflect that clearly. [1]

Getting back to the topic of intellectual revolution, we must acknowledge that revolutions emanate as rightly pointed out from the vast ocean of various ideas and reactions.

Ideas in turn are inherited from the regional socio-cultural milieu where one is born and groomed in formative years or imported from a different or another socio-cultural milieu.

There are also a set of ancillary ideas that are generated as a result of innate or inherent reactions-either impulsive, identity based or ideology based- to the situations that prevail around that lead to promoting growth and development in certain aspects while preventing the same in certain other areas.

But to presume or project revolutions as  merely confined to economic conditions and social comforts alone is looking at only certain predominant aspects of revolutions.

Each individual and each social set up gets its satisfaction and sense of happiness from different things which include economic and social welfare as well as many other things.

Technology is enabling a vast majority to come out of ignorance and at least be aware of various conditions prevailing at different parts of the planet demarked by atlas of national boundaries, defined by socio-economic and political conditions ad at the same time nurtured by a culture of realization of certain basic common social responsibilities at least in the interest of species protection as a process on evolution.

However, certain basic conditions must exist at least to leverage on the benefits of technology.

Most likely future revolutions will involve ripping off human psyche from its adamant fixations and identities with irrelevant and out dated institutions that dictated the dos and don’ts of their life.

Besides these, there are many of aspects which must be factored in when we talk of revolution.

Otherwise revolution will only bring up the trite image of violent aggression unleashed as an off shoot of some ideology perpetrated through misguided manipulations of brainwashing propaganda.


Better and enhanced realization of actual social conditions or situations and economic wants along with chaffing off those irrelevant factors with the least damage to everything will be the next sane revolution.

This will ensure, though may not erase totally, the differences amid human race also some level playing field with basic economic needs and better social systems to ensure a smoother living for maximum number of people with the least damage to the environment and other species.


These will be accompanied by a culture of tolerance to try and nurture different ideas emanating from everywhere for overall benefit of all.

Wherein real wisdom will dawn on everyone, by wisdom I mean a wisdom which is the work shop where works of evolutionary trends and experiences of everyone in it emerge to express wisely the essence of everything to enlighten everyone.

A wisdom which prioritizes living in the present context and along with practicing certain time tested values which have relevance in present context but with global perspective to bequeath a livable planet, a lovable society with lovely infrastructures and improved living conditions.

Most important aspect of wisdom when we discuss the topic of revolutions is to realize that they incubate in the mind space of individuals as ideas, thoughts, opinions, information and so on.


Therefore, those in responsible positions whose ideas, thoughts and opinions get enough attention and respect must in turn pay attention and respect the immense responsibility that they have as mass opinion molders.


All these could be done with clear cut awareness along with acceptance and understanding of the inevitable realities of life like in a globalized world where we are all creatures of the same planet wherein xenophobic attitudes or ethnocentric pride will all be huge marks of psychological weaknesses and disadvantages.


We must accept the inevitability of identities without getting fanatically addicted to certain specific identities be they doctrinal, ideological, religious, political, economic, cultural and so on.

We must accept the inevitability of polarity principle which is part and parcel of evolutionary trends in all spheres of life starting from the biological to everything else and stop zooming it as division  or disparity or viewing it as either a paradox or playing victim hood where it is not intentionally or viciously inflicted.


We must accept the inevitability of becoming and gradually being global citizens without xenophobia.

We must accept the inevitability of, if at all required, evaluating everything and everyone with contextual relevance and based on the inherent attributes or merits of what or who is being evaluated without extrapolating our presumptions, opinions, judgments, perceptions, expectations, ideologies etc.

We must accept the inevitability of actually realizing that variety is indeed the SPICE of life. Source, Resource, Inevitable, Central Essence of nature.




Most importantly we all must accept the inevitability, therefore, of realizing that homogenization and uniformity can never be the desired outcomes of any revolution because then that would lead us to further conflicts emanating from the inevitable fact of variety.

It is therefore, preferable that certain of these inevitabilities and the methods of dealing with them are made part of education, culture and nurtured attitudes to ensure that revolutions happen without causing too much of damage.

We may start from making minor adjustments, small compromises, spontaneous cooperation to create compatible and conducive atmosphere with humility devoid of any egocentric pride.

These along with the realization and a perspective that must be aware that life is a constant process of learning of the multiple dimensions of many things and the various dynamics of those dimensions involving the constant interaction and interrelationship with everyone and everything.

These must ensure to accommodate multiple methods or means of life with a overall tolerant attitude embedded on humanitarian concerns towards all human life and environmental or natural concern towards all other species.

It is creating and nurturing facts based, frank admission based functional volition that will lead to a better social evolution.
Refined volitions evolve from nurtured understanding while revolutions are mostly unleashed.



Ultimately natural evolution and natural laws always seem to consider the trade off for anything that we do.
History and posterity too will evaluate based on the trade off for whatever good or bad deed that we do.

I have at various times written on all the above factors or facets of life and living.

I am giving below the links to some of them

Global citizen- the necessity
Identity- the stumbling block to accepting Variety and forging Unity
Polarity principle
Evaluation
Tolerance

Environmental concerns
Education
Homogenization and uniformity
Perspective
Xenophobia
[1] Volition [n] the act of willing, choosing, or resolving; exercise of willing
Etymology of volition: Latin volitio(n- ), from old French volo then Vouloir =‘I wish’
Revolution  [n] a sudden, complete or marked change in something or some condition.
Etymology of Revolution Latin revolutio(n- ), from revolvere ‘roll back’=    replacement of an established or existing order or system


Saturday, October 1, 2016

Perspectives, Impacts, Choices and Decisions


Perspectives, Impacts, Choices and Decisions play a very important role in all spheres of life whether we are aware of it or consciously willing to accept it.

Impacts may influence our perspectives, choices and decisions and similarly our choices, decisions and perspective do impact and influence many things starting from our perception to performance.  It is a sort of inevitable logical obverse.

In every field the story of human evolution is nothing but the history of impacts either positive or negative made by people who refused to take the beaten track and no wonder that George Bernard Shaw is reported to have said

"The reasonable man adapts himself to the world. The unreasonable man adapts the world to himself. All progress depends upon the unreasonable man”.

That is one of the reasons why more people prefer reading literature because of its impact than books on grammar or dictionaries.


Literature is a natural creative splendor which evolves according to its own dynamics unfettered by limitations of lexicon. Words, expressions, usage all play their part in that romance.  


Each life i.e. my life, your life and the lives of all great saints are really speaking very insignificant transient events of a few years-mostly less than 100 in flesh and blood with conscious awareness- compared to LIFE as a whole which has happened some four million years before and may continue for another few millions years hence in various forms, shapes in multiple species expressing its own attributes some of which we have understood, some we are not even aware of.
In fact the whole of Bhagawad Gita, one of the reasons why it became more popular among the 28 Gitas, is that all its 700 stanzas are sand- witched between two words the starting word 'Dharma' and the last word ‘Mama’.

It must be actually read as ‘Mama Dharma’= my dharma- does not mean either Krishna’s or Arjuna’s Dharma, rather  when everyone reads it becomes ‘his Dhrama’ and all these 700 verses [ subjected to all sorts of excellent, enlightening as well as, often used as tool to justifying traditional practices, explanations by many] primarily are about attitudes to be adopted, actions to be executed and reactions to show at different situations taking into consideration the overall welfare of all [humanism].


This manual is more about balancing the intellect and emotions and most importantly through both emotions and intellect, or to be precise in short it talks about the dynamics of synthesis of human nature and nature of Truth [ define as you may- it is the inevitable and intellectual perception and sometimes all logic eluding factor].


Life is all about movements, actions and reactions which broadly could be defined as i.e. Karma but then the Laws [Dharma ] of motions [Karma] of life are very important and therefore prioritized.


Personal grief, sorrows and miseries are difficult to handle even for some of the most advanced intellectual giants or highly sane and even balanced souls.
It is easier to sit and sermonize or pontificate dispassionately as an outsider.

It is difficult to prescribe rules for any type of crisis in any aspect of life.

However, if the mind, especially, that of a grown up individual, is equipped with certain qualities; then encountering the crisis becomes a shade more simple and sane.

However, the balanced mind, calm soul, caring heart, clever mind will wait and work on multiple options before resorting to impulsive actions which may more often result in regret.

Life is the sum total of many choices and decisions we make/take at every moment and the concomitant actions and reactions based on them.

But, does life or our cultures or social systems or religions or education systems offer us readymade templates to make/to take relevant or correct choices and decisions with multiple options at every moment?


Or   even if they offer and are ready, are we willing or capable of understanding and making use of those templates?








Why Did the Chicken Cross the Road –taken from a book- some observations and all you may add your own personalities and unleash your imagination and write

Plato: For the greater good.

Karl Marx: It was a historical inevitability.

Machiavellia: So that its subjects will view it with admiration, as a chicken which has the daring and courage to boldly cross the road, but also with fear, for whom among them has the strength to contend with such a paragon of avian virtue? In such a manner is the princely chicken's dominion maintained.

Hippocrates: Because of an excess of black bile and a deficiency of choleric humor.


Jacques Derrida: Any number of contending discourses may be discovered within the act of the chicken crossing the road, and each interpretation is equally valid as the authorial intent can never be discerned, because structuralism is DEAD, DAMMIT, DEAD!

Thomas de Torquemada: Give me ten minutes with the chicken and I'll find out.

Timothy Leary: Because that's the only kind of trip the Establishment would let it take.

Douglas Adams: Forty-two.

Nietzsche: Because if you gaze too long across the Road, the Road gazes also across you.

B.F. Skinner: Because the external influences which had pervaded its sensorium from birth had caused it to develop in such a fashion that it would tend to cross roads, even while believing these actions to be of its own free will.


Carl Jung: The confluence of events in the cultural gestalt necessitated that individual chickens cross roads at this historical juncture, and therefore synchronicitously brought such occurrences into being.

Jean-Paul Sartre: In order to act in good faith and be true to itself, the chicken found it necessary to cross the road.

Ludwig Wittgenstein: The possibility of "crossing" was encoded into the objects "chicken" and "road", and circumstances came into being which caused the actualization of this potential occurrence.

Albert Einstein: Whether the chicken crossed the road or the road crossed the chicken depends upon your frame of reference.


Aristotle: To actualize its potential.

Buddha: If you ask this question, you deny your own chicken- nature.

 David Hume: Out of custom and habit.


Salvador Dali: The Fish. Darwin: It was the logical next step after coming down from the trees.


Emily Dickinson: Because it could not stop for death.

 Epicurus: For fun.


Ralph Waldo Emerson: It didn't cross the road; it transcended it.

Johann von Goethe: The eternal hen-principle made it do it.

Ernest Hemingway: To die. In the rain.


Werner Heisenberg: We are not sure which side of the road the chicken was on, but it was moving very fast.

Jack Nicholson: 'Cause it (censored) wanted to. That's the (censored) reason.


Pyrrho the Skeptic: What road?


The Sphinx: You tell me.

Henry David Thoreau: To live deliberately ... and suck all the marrow out of life.


Howard Cosell: It may very well have been one of the most astonishing events to grace the annals of history. An historic, unprecedented avian biped with the temerity to attempt such a herculean achievement formerly relegated to homo sapien pedestrians is truly a remarkable occurence.



Ronald Reagan: I forget.


Mark Twain: The news of its crossing has been greatly exaggerated. Zeno of Elea: To prove it could never reach the other side.