Life of Meaningful Happiness

Life impregnated with meaning and imbued with happiness

I liked the article especially its contents predominantly discussing about meaning of life and the role of happiness.

It had lot of references to parenting, the emotions and difficulties involved along with how different reactions are manifested based on various perspectives and attitudes.

The trade off must be the ultimate wisdom that emanates from all and enables individual, society, humanity to lead a smooth life and ensures a safe environment.

Most of these are based on realization of reality and how we evaluate anything and everything based on the contextual relevance.

As I perceive it there are ten major aspects around which this article is woven and all these ten aspects have always caught my attention and therefore I have written lengthy articles on all these. Those who have time may go through the links and the sub links therein and are welcome to make your comments on the content.

1. Meaning of life

http://contentwriteups.blogspot.in/2016/02/meaning-of-life.html

2. Happiness

http://contentwriteups.blogspot.in/2016/09/success-and-happiness.html

3. Parenting

http://contentwriteups.blogspot.in/2016/09/parenting.html

4. Wisdom that emanates must ensure humanitarianism and compassion at present and concern for posterity as well

http://contentwriteups.blogspot.in/2016/10/humility-tolerance-humanitarianism-and.html

5. Perspective

http://contentwriteups.blogspot.in/2016/05/perspective-matters-more-than.html

6. Attitude

http://contentwriteups.blogspot.in/2010/12/attitude.html

7. Emotions

http://contentwriteups.blogspot.in/2015/05/life-unending-puzzle-lessons-of-life.html

http://contentwriteups.blogspot.in/2016/08/emotions-paradox.html

8. Realization of reality

http://contentwriteups.blogspot.in/2013/12/new-year-with-new-realization-of-reality.html

http://contentwriteups.blogspot.in/2016/09/reality.html

9. Polarity principle pervades and not paradoxes

http://contentwriteups.blogspot.in/2016/08/paradoxes-or-polarity.html

10. Abstractness of thoughts 

http://contentwriteups.blogspot.in/2016/10/abstractness-of-reality-thoughts-and.html

Success and Happiness

What is success? What is happiness? What is real education? What is reality?

It is actually good and fortunate that these debates about what constitutes happiness? What constitutes success? What type of education is real education are fortunately floating around.

It is all the more welcome trend if these are debated seriously in the realms of scholarly academic circles involving psychologists, psychiatrists, besides, of course  politicians, economists, entrepreneurs and all other concerned leaders, mass opinion molders and other manipulators of social perception who involve in social engineering for various purposes and all these invariably spilling onto social media as well.

Even if  nothing of great worth or value emerges out of all these questions, at least they reflect our inclination and inquisitiveness to know something else or something more than what all these terms like success, happiness, education have been referring to so for.

Besides, these debates inevitably lead to rethinking and reworking many out dated models and also they try to remove fixed definitions of certain concepts which are loosely and carelessly used without realizing the influence and impact that they have on especially impressionable minds and the injury that they inflict to those who are unable to fulfill the deemed correct definitions of these terms-which incidentally lead to many major psychological, neurological and social problems.

The worst symptoms of all these terms are the labels that get appropriated and assigned unmindful of the social and psychological impact that they can have.

I have written on all the three above referred terms, namely Success, Happiness, and Education at various platforms at different times, sometimes these terms do not pop up as they are but they are injected in certain other versions through a clever usage of plethora of thesaurus of terminological tirade which flushes down all nuances of life forms on its way.

The social engineers of various hues and colors mostly politicians, religious leaders, media persons, business houses to name a few who deliberately define these terms to suit their agenda.

The following three quotes I find hit the nail more effectively.

"The simplicities of natural laws arise through the complexities of the language we use for their expression."- Eugene Wigner

"Abandon the urge to simplify everything, to look for formulas and easy answers, and to begin to think multi-dimensionally, to glory in the mystery and paradoxes of life, not to be dismayed by the multitude of causes and consequences that are inherent in each experience -- to appreciate the fact that life is complex."- M. Scott Peck

“An array of coordinated genes is required to explain even the minutest human phenomenon.’Discoveries' of a 'gambling gene' here and an 'aggression gene' there are derided by the more serious and less publicity-prone scholars. Yet, it would seem that even complex behaviours such as risk taking, reckless driving, and compulsive shopping have genetic underpinnings."- The Selfish Gene – The Genetic Underpinnings of Narcissism

I wrote the following  for a detailed article and debate in a forum of global education the topic was the myopic one ‘Growing up and settling down’

http://contentwriteups.blogspot.in/2015/10/living-growing-up-and-settling-down.html

[Life in its very essence means lively so it cannot settle down. Settling down is a loosely used and well accepted terminological contradiction.

Life has neither a pause button nor is it a pass it on baton.

Everything is part of life and not apart from life and therefore cannot be kept apart for a future date or an assumed future condition.]

I need to search for some of my old articles on Happiness and success, invariably very long ones and need to load them too in my blogs.

However, you may find a lot of Education and Reality in my blogs.

Definitions and debates are necessaryhttp://contentwriteups.blogspot.in/2015/10/definitions-and-debates-too-much-of.html

Be true to yourself

Be true to yourself

You have touched upon a topic too vast and vital that I cannot restrict the length of my comments.

First I must say not to boast you that you write really well through exact articulation of your real feelings.

It is always true that an ounce of personally involved actual experience is worth more than an ocean of philosophy that rests in books or in brain as mere ideas, thoughts and words or manifested as hypocritical and superficial display of certain practices.

Conscious self acceptance of reality and search for actions/answers/solutions to deal with the reality, in whatever way one wishes, is the first honest and good step towards mental maturity.

But it must be done preferably along with one’s own perception of life as it is encountered and lived based on one’s own perspective along with the aid of sublime ideas, suggestions and advises by wise souls who have documented for our convenience their wisdom in words and deeds through similar experiences that they have undergone.

This where I always admire the honest wisdom of Issac Newton who said, “If I have seen further it is by standing on the shoulders of giants”.

The above approach enables the process of search leading to some probable realization to be swift, sober and saner with consciously aware consideration of subtle aspects of life in its multiple dimensions with all its myriad dynamics which may elude even the most honest and highest perception.

However, as George Savile says, “The struggling for knowledge hath a pleasure in it like that of wrestling with a fine woman”. The relationship with thoughts and ideas gives greater pleasure.

What is of greater importance is the perspective with which one may look at everything in the search without getting influenced excessively by any form of ideological or identity fixation, however great or good it may have been because life moves constantly in different contexts and situations each requiring different adaptations as in biological evolution or mental flexibility.

This is an important attitude which will ensure immense tolerance with sense and sensitivity without overt violent aggression or introverted psychological suppression.

I am happy that you are developing an inner relationship with lofty ideas that you come across in life with unbiased attitude to experiment and experience.

Ultimately reality is half formed by our perception and perspective and all thoughts that we think, as per scientific study are in existence somewhere already.

However, our contribution is in how creatively we use them to specific situations sanely realizing the meaning of life or injecting meaning to life while simultaneously also discharging /succumbing to inevitable obligations of life [even those that are utterly stupid or irrelevant or idiotic] and exigencies and imperatives of survival  as a manifestation of our life as social creatures.

I have read and written volumes and volumes on reality, realization, meaning of life and so on, still my search continues as I encounter life at every moment without idealizing it or intellectualizing it or emotionalizing it or politicizing it or subjecting it to my ideological prejudices or socio –cultural of religious definitions because then observation is unconditioned and unbiased and awareness reveals at least some part of reality though I am aware that I cannot always exhibit that reality outwardly for various reasons.

I would like you to read this small piece of ten points on perception

http://contentwriteups.blogspot.in/2010/02/real-perception.html

It is nice to start the journey to be true to yourself but one life time is not enough to know the real ‘yourself’ the moment that anyone realizes that then that is the truth as expressed, experienced and exhibited many wise souls.

Along with these deeper thinking process, impulse to realize truth or true meaning of life at your age you must also not miss to enjoy life with gay abandon away from too much of serious thinking always.

Life is there to be lived happily and peacefully trying our best to make this happy feeling and calmness with simple living and high thinking an influencing factor to all those around us.

and also do not miss this wonderful site

http://www.drmardy.com/

Life's socio- political churning process seems to get struck in identities of various hues and colors

      First facts in JNU case

1. https://www.facebook.com/hitesh.tiwary/videos/959510627473785/

2. Unfortunately, in the whole world Life's socio- political churning process instead of becoming and being more rational, scientific and humane, seems to get struck in identities of various hues and colors indicating a mindset worse than that of the sixteenth century.

3. Identity crisis is becoming one of the greatest curses of this century

http://contentwriteups.blogspot.in/2015/08/identity-entire-gamut-of- identitys.html

4. In ThinkEdu16 conference in concluding session Sri Sri Ravishankar answered spontaneously very well to VC of a university in very simple terms how to avoid irrational depressions due to high expectations and corresponding disappointment.

5. He used just three very effective words. He said you definitely need 'Passion' to perform effectively but 'Dispassion' to carry on with shortcomings and failures. He said when you succeed in Passion you enjoy, when you have this 'Dispassion' then you do not 'hate yourself' between these two if you have 'Compassion' then you do not hate or blame others. So he said you need Passion, Dispassion and Compassion -all the three.

6. I think this simple mantra can contribute enough moderation and sense of balance which is the ultimate test of a matured person.

7. No one starts and must not start or cannot start all aspects of life in moderation.

8. Aggression, passion, influence, impact, intensity are the things that spice up the adventure of life but then everyone must grow out of these experiences into a matured balanced person acting with moderation.

9. http://contentwriteups.blogspot.in/2015/09/composed-mind-is-all-about-balance.html

10. But it is also high time that all individuals and institutions which feel responsible for youth, future generations, and posterity of humanity must emphasis and consciously promote  virtues of moderation, tolerance, forgiveness, compassion, accepting facts, happiness, contextual relevance of whatever is done  etc as most important tenets of emancipated human beings practicing a universal religion.

Positives of JNU protests IB can prevent terrorist attacks/funding by strictly monitoring JNU, AAP, LEFT, ISI, MSM nexus

Happiness, Reality,Evaluations, Perception and Gadgets

Here, your write up throws up four or five main issues for which or through which or to grasp the relevance or relationship of these things life churns up its experiences and encounters. These things are not necessary in this order but 1. What is happiness or what factors lead to real happiness?  2. What is reality or have we realized the truth of what is reality to declare with axiomatic certitude that something is reality and something is happiness etc? 3. How we perceive things, i.e. what is perception? 4. Evaluation, what is it and how do we evaluate anything or anyone and how can we be sure that our method of evaluation is the best one? 5. What is the role, relationship, relevance and our interaction viz à viz gadgets?

Before we get into explaining all these we must accept a broad premise, that is , we can neither defy nor deny the importance, relevance or existence of anything or anyone .Everyone and everything is a piece in the jigsaw puzzle called life . Life is not a mere biological accident. It is boon to be enjoyed, enriched, experienced and enlightened by every individual with a sense of gratitude for everything that happens and towards everyone that we encounter.

I am flooding you with some very lengthy materials with lots of links but I can assure you that all these will be inspiring and instigating the thought process.

1.       On reality

http://contentwriteups.blogspot.in/2013/12/new-year-with-new-realization-of-reality.html

http://contentwriteups.blogspot.in/2014/10/reality-unbiased-approaches.html

http://contentwriteups.blogspot.in/2014/10/reality-and-what-is-real.html

2.       Evaluations

Coming to the aspect of evaluation, how to normally encounter and evaluate any subject or topic?

It is preferable to  immerse  any topic or subject matter, primarily and basically with its intrinsic elements/components/aspects/attributes intact, into a cauldron which has  a mixture of all these- knowledge based analysis, limited perception based on frames of reference and scales of observation, skepticism , criticism, intellectual scrutiny, compassionate emotionalism, humane socialism, rational thinking, contextual relevance [ which includes too many components] , traditions, practical viability, psychological comfort, aesthetic sensitivity, scientific scrutiny etc and  churn the cauldron without clinging on to any particular restrictive social, cultural or political or religious identity.

This process inevitably will bring out lot of outputs. We can exercise our freedom and sometimes select and choose some of the outputs. Sometimes the outputs will draw us. Sometimes away from all or any of our intended searches and seeking, outside the circle of these known paradigms, almost tangentially serendipity will drag us to an oasis of serene clarity.

At all costs the intrinsic attributes must be the predominant factor. So that, whatever is thrown into the cauldron and however it is churned, the ultimate output must include those attributes to ensure that our evaluation is not distorted or desperately doctored to fit into any predefined and expected outcome.

So, what pans out ultimately depends on various factors and aspects some of which are explainable within the ken of logical and rational thinking but some are beyond these.

We can also observe uneasily how the human intellect polished by a rare faculty [compared to other species] of conscious awareness, capacity to think, store the knowledge, retrieve it for reference etc, is mostly, unwilling to take the risk of accepting the uncertain; the intellectually undecipherable and the inexplicable outcomes, even if such acceptance is branded, extolled and promoted as virtues of humility or modesty.

For example if one is evaluating music, one must ensure that music quality/musicality as an intrinsic aspect must be highlighted and then evaluate the other extraneous factors like who renders it, how it is rendered, who is the composer, what is the composition, what is the lyrics, how is the acoustic quality, how the person who is rendering it is dressed, how was the ambiance of the place where it was rendered etc.

This blog posting delves rather deep into the process of evaluation

http://contentwriteups.blogspot.in/2014/08/evaluations-and-tmks-blindness.html

Specifically the link in that http://contentwriteups.blogspot.in/2013/12/story-of-mango-fruit-sambar-and.html

If you have enough time you may go through this as well.

http://contentwriteups.blogspot.in/2013/12/carnatic-music-cockroaches-cars.html

3.       Happiness

http://contentwriteups.blogspot.in/2011/12/happiness-advice.html

http://contentwriteups.blogspot.in/2013/02/psychotherapy-essential-secrets-of.html

4.       Perception

http://contentwriteups.blogspot.in/2010/02/real-perception.html

http://contentwriteups.blogspot.in/2014/02/why-wendy-misinterprets.html

5.       Gadgets

But for spectacles most of us would all be grouping about with defective vision. Without microscope we would have never known the microbes or molecules. So every garget also is born to fulfill a specific need. Without recording devices we would have lost lot of great music etc

Gadgets are semi gods, if not gods.

http://contentwriteups.blogspot.in/2013/01/parenting-and-individual-souls-liberty.html

 I wish all of you read the wonderful book by Thomas Crump ‘A brief history of science as seen through the development of scientific instruments’ to get an idea as to how these inventions have shaped our lives in many ways.

http://contentwriteups.blogspot.in/2013/10/why-all-of-us-have-tendency-to-compare.html

6.       Gather knowledge from as many sources as possible

http://contentwriteups.blogspot.in/2011/12/gather-knowledge-from-as-many-sources.html

“All of us have our own inner fears, beliefs, opinions. These inner assumptions rule and govern our lives. A suggestion has no power in and of itself. Its power arises from the fact that you accept it mentally.” 
― Joseph Murphy, The Power of Your Subconscious Mind

We must realize that the subconscious mind is the law of action and always expresses what the conscious mind has impressed on it. What we regularly entertain in our mind creates a conception of self. What we conceive ourselves to be, we become.” Grace Speare.

Psychotherapy-Essential Secrets of Psychotherapy: Jung's Typology, Eudaemonology, and the Elusive Art of Happiness

Why do introverts and extraverts have such difficulty relating to each other?

Published on May 26, 2012 by Stephen A. Diamond, Ph.D. in Evil Deeds

The terms "introvert" and "extravert" (note the proper spelling with a rather than o) were originally introduced by Swiss psychiatrist C.G. Jung in his now classic text Psychological Types (1921). People are sometimes surprised to learn that Jung's text is the basis for the popular Myers-Briggs Type Indicator (MBTI), and the less well known Gray-Wheelwright Test and Singer-Loomis Type Deployment Inventory (SL-TDI). While these Jungian systems of type testing can be interesting--formulating complex permutations of introversion, extraversion, feeling, thinking, sensation, intuition, judging and perceiving--as a practicing depth psychologist, I have always found Jung's primary notions of introversion and extraversion to be the most clinically and conceptually useful.

Traditionally, because we in western culture tend to take a more extraverted orientation to life (as compared, for instance, to India and Asia), introverts have long been prejudicially perceived as being selfish, narcissistic, pathologically shy or even psychotic. But this sometimes vicious negative bias toward introverts and introversion has started to change lately, due in part to the burgeoning interest in meditation andmindfulness (two forms of introverted activity), the gradually growing popularity of Jung's (introverted) psychology, as well as the publication of various recent books on the subject such as Marti Olsen Laney's The Introvert Advantage: How to Thrive in an Extrovert World (2002) and PT blogger Susan Cain's currently bestselling Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World that Can't Stop Talking, among others. (See Cain's post on whether extraverts or introverts are more happy.)

If, as pop author and relationship counselor John Gray (1992) suggests, men and women are seemingly from different planets, introverts and extraverts must be from different solar systems. While a man and woman who are both extraverted or introverted types tend, despite their psychobiological gender differences, to see eye to eye and share similar values, an extraverted man and introverted woman have not only their opposing sexual psychology to bridge, but their typology too. (See myprior post.) This polarizing combination or type and gender can present almost insurmountable differences. Even two individuals of the same sex, but opposing typology, have their work cut out for them.Opposites attract and can complement each other. But they commonly are also the cause of confusion, conflict and constant consternation.

For example, a wife might be an extraverted type, wanting constantly to go out into the world, have adventures, meet people, etc. Her husband, on the other hand, is an introvert, for whom none of that holds much fascination. He wants nothing more than to stay home and think, read, contemplate, dream. His introverted attitude values the inner life over the outer; hers the outer over the inner. His libidinal energy is directed inwardly, while hers is directed outwardly. You see how this can wreak serious havoc in relationships? Particularly when neither party comprehends where the other is coming from, typologically speaking.

Here is a quick, easy and, in my experience, fairly accurate way to determine your own typology: When you feel down, stressed, burnt-out, tired, overwhelmed, drained or exhausted, what do you do (or want to do) to feel better? What works best to recharge your psychological or spiritual battery? Typically, there are two kinds of responses to this question. What's yours? Note it now. We'll come back to this shortly.

For Jung, there were essentially two types of people: introverts and extraverts. (See my prior post.) These were Jung's terms, for which he gives specific definitions. While his term introversion is today widely used as a synonym for shyness, introversion is not necessarily shyness. But there is a close relationship between shyness and introversion, which Jung felt (and I fully agree) is largely an innate tendency. (This strongly contradicts a  post here on shyness claiming little or no congenital influence at all! ) Introversion is a turning inward toward the interior world of ideas, feelings, fantasies, intuitions, sensations, and other facets of subjective experience. The introverted type finds most of his or her meaning and satisfaction not in the outer world of people, objects, things, accomplishments, but rather in the interior life, the inner world. Extraverts, on the other hand, live almost exclusively in and for the exterior world, deriving fulfillment from regular interaction with outer reality.

Introverts tend to have difficulty dealing with the outer world in general. Extraverts have equal trouble attending to the inner world. And both resist doing so, in what frequently becomes a chronic, habitual pattern of avoidant behavior. Depth psychology, and Jungian analysis specifically, emphasize the importance of understanding, accepting and honoring one's own typology. It can also be helpful to consider the typology of significant others too: spouses, lovers, friends, parents, siblings, co-workers, etc. Jung's central point about typology is that our particular psychological type is a powerful lens through which we view life, and determines how we see, relate to, and interpret reality. What is so astounding is how fundamentally and diametrically different extraverted and introverted types truly are! By their very nature, these are radically divergent modes of being-in-the-world, antithetical attitudes toward life.

Of course, no person is totally introverted or extraverted. These are two extreme poles on a continuum which we all occupy. A majority of us lean toward the extraverted orientation, placing true introverted types in the statistical minority in most westernized cultures. Indeed, introversion tends to be stigmatized in our culture, pathologized, and deemed abnormal. When introversion is extremely one-sided, it can turn into pathological shyness, social phobia, schizoid personality, autism or even psychosis: a total detachment or dissociation from outer reality. Extreme extraversion can manifest in compulsive activity, workaholism, mania and addictive behaviors (e.g., sex addiction) serving the purpose of avoiding introversion or self-reflection at any cost. Some rhythmic balance between introversion and extraversion is essential for mental health. Introversion and extraversion appear to be innate temperaments or personality traits which can be and are, however, influenced by environment. For example, in a highly extraverted society like the United States, or strongly extraverted family, introversion is often discouraged beginning inchildhood, with extraversion being encouraged as the acceptable social norm. As a result, many naturally introverted types strive to become extraverts, developing an extraverted persona, but inexplicably, feel chronically anxious, fatigued or depressed. This could also occur when an extraverted type is overly constrained by a socially or religiously imposed façade of introversion. Sometimes, extreme extraversion or introversion stem, paradoxically, from too much of its opposite, a compensatory reaction of the psyche to correct for excessive one-sidedness.

Essential Secrets of Psychotherapy: Jung's Typology, Eudaemonology, and the Elusive Art of Happiness

Why do introverts and extraverts have such difficulty relating to each other?

Published on May 26, 2012 by Stephen A. Diamond, Ph.D. in Evil Deeds

Now, to return to that little test you took earlier. If you responded that all you want to do to nurture yourself and recharge your battery is to stay at home, read a book, take a bath, meditate, listen to music, and to do so mainly solo, you probably tend toward the introverted pole. You are likely at least fifty-one percent an introvert. What do you think the extraverted type says? You are probably more extraverted if you gave this typical response: "I want to go out and be with people, go to a party, do something exciting." You see, this is what fills the extravert's tank when it's on empty. But for the introvert, this sort of extraverted activity, especially when feeling depleted, is a profoundly repugnant prospect. As is the prospect of introspection, silence and solitude for the extravert. Why? Because to rejuvenate themselves, to replenish their energy, the introvert must introvert. And the extravert must extravert. It's in their nature. But also because we all harbor a primal fear of and resistance to theunconscious, or what Jung called the shadow, which contains those underdeveloped aspects of ourselves we consider "inferior" and of no redeeming value. (See my prior post.)

What happens when someone either doesn't know what their own typology is, or rejects it? What if you weren't able to answer the aforementioned question because you don't yet know how to recharge your battery, haven't found what works for you? Or know what would renew you but never do it? When introverted types try to live like extraverts, they have problems, because they have lost connection to their true introverted selves, the re-energizing ground of their being. The same can be said about extraverted types who, wanting to be more "spiritual" or contemplative, cut themselves off from the material world. They have each lost their relationship to their touchstone. It is quite true that Jung's idea of individuation --the process of becoming more balanced and whole--requires introverted types to develop and integrate what he deemed their "inferior function," their extraversion; and for extraverted types to cultivate their capacity for introversion. For both types, this is exceedingly difficult work. What comes naturally to the extravert, requires enormous effort for the introvert. And vice-versa. But it cannot be accomplished by denying one's innate typology and attempting to replace it with its opposite. (Though during the individuation process, the pendulum may sometimes swing wildly from one extreme to the other before finding balance.) The introverted type must learn to extravert, honing his or her extraverted skills, but will always remain an introvert. Just as extraverted types need to learn to introvert but will always be extraverts. Balance is the key. As with much of psychotherapy, it's about learning to accept and take care of oneself, and recognizing that refusing to honor one's typology--and that of others--is ultimately self-defeating, futile and destructive.

Our typology profoundly influences the way we dress, style our hair, decorate our homes, spend our free time, eat, sleep (see my prior post), the career we choose, the car we drive, which movies we prefer, our appreciation of art, ourreligious beliefs, and the way we see the world. When our choices in such fundamental matters, whether conscious or unconscious, closely coincide with our innate personalitytype, we are practicing what, in his book The Wisdom of Life, philosopher Arthur Schopenhauer (following Aristotle) refers to as eudaemonology: "ordering our lives so as to obtain the greatest possible amount of pleasure and success; an art the theory of which may be called Eudaemonology, for it teaches us how to lead a happy existence." So recognizing, honoring and living in harmony with our congenital typology (eudaimonism) can be said to be one of the essential secrets to human happiness.