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Saturday, June 23, 2018

Father's Day in general


Father's Day a few years back someone asked me to write a 500 word article.

Whether it is Mother's Day or Father's Day, parenting has a lot of nice things and offers many lessons.

Any relationship we may choose to evaluate or expect aspects like trust, reciprocation, gratitude, understanding and multitude of other compatibility aspects and trade-offs.

However, when it is the parental relationship, none of those are expected and that is the very beauty of this unique relationship where most things are present, taken for granted and most importantly many sublime factors are on offer like unqualified affection, care and love.

Best part is till children grow up it is mostly one way traffic.

This is perhaps the reason why our tradition has placed duty bound reverence in this order Matha, Pitha, Guru, Daivam. [Mother, Father, Teacher and God] 

Parenting involves too many things with too much of involvement.

Many of which may be contradictions, blatant manifestations of hypocrisy etc.

However, they all work together with too many strong ,personal , interpersonal emotions like care, concern, some amount of possessiveness, obsessive protectionism, sentimentalism, indescribable love which does not seek reciprocation; being and wanting to be physically and mentally available; wanting and willing to eagerly participate in the growth and evolution of the children etc. 

All of these can be realized only when one is or becomes a parent.

However, the following advice brings some sanity to otherwise too involved parenting.

"When you parent, it’s crucial you realize you aren’t raising a ‘mini me’ but a spirit throbbing with its own Signtaure- Dr. Shefali Tsabary.

This is nothing but what JK used to say as allowing the inward flowering.

Parenting very often does not know to differentiate between involvement and intrusion.

All said and done life is best ensconced only in the warmth of parental love which can be taken for granted at any circumstance.

People whose parents are no more alive, when they think of them, many fond memories cascade down the spine and fine feelings gush up the spine and both together flood the heart and choke the throat.

We all need to relish with love the relationship of our parents for whatever they did or did not or could not do and as parents let us do whatever we can to our children with love.



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